Is it true the best relationships come from friendships?
Or could it be the best friendships are born from accidental relationships?
I spent an extended lunch break today with a very dear person - a person I've admired as a community leader for many years; a person I've even spent time with on several fundraising committees; but she was the last person I expected to have reach out to me with such comfort and care.
She said she was surprised I accepted her invitation for lunch.
I said I was surprised by the invitation.
We met at the beach, sat at a picnic table on a picture-perfect, chamber-of-commerce day in paradise, ate the chowder and salad she brought, and talked and talked. She listened and then spoke about her experiences with the loss of her own mother. She listened, again, and held my hand as I cried. She told me about her waves of emotion and how those waves creep up on her unexpectedly. We talked about some things I haven't spoken of with many others; like my mother's "awakening" on the evening before her death.
We both talked about some disappointments in hospice care and the final days of our mothers, and while it felt very healing - she also told me not to expect our conversation to be the magic wand I'm looking for.
She said that I needed to take my journey, accepting help along the way, but remembering that it may take a while - to travel at my own speed.
I'm sure that's true, but I'm forever grateful to this pillar of the community for taking so much time out of her busy schedule to offer her heart to me.
Tomorrow marks 11 years since I lost my father. I'm sure he's happy to have his wife of 65 years back with him, but if I had my druthers -- they'd both be right here.
