For nearly all of the celebrations in our lives as I was growing up, Mom made her fabulous, unlike any other meatloaf. Birthdays, good grades, choir concerts and other momentous occasions were made even more special with Mom's home-cooked meatloaf, mashed potatoes and green beans. And if that meal was on the table, there was also a party goin' on in our mouths, because everyone in the family agreed that Mom's sweet meatloaf was the absolute best.
So, tonight, as I reflect on this past year, my husband and I are celebrating my mother's life with a special meal - her meatloaf. I haven't made it since before she passed away one year ago tomorrow.
Before I get out all the ingredients, I want to share a story that's been difficult for me to discuss. I hope you don't mind, but you'll understand why I need to share it today, and why I've chosen today to celebrate Mom and all she was and still is to me.
In the late afternoon on Sept. 25, as she was lying in her newly erected hospital bed (which she did not want brought in, and had to be convinced that it would be the best thing for her), I took her bag of cross-stitching to her. She had been in severe pain, and I thought I could help get her mind off of that and on to something more positive. I've mentioned in past posts that she cross-stitched ornaments for all of the girls in the family every year and gave them as gifts at Thanksgiving.
When I opened the bag and told her that I could only find three of her ornaments, there was an immediate change in her -- exactly at that moment -- a change that lasted about three hours. But in looking back, it seems like it was only minutes. She took the bag from me and began looking through it saying she had made more than that. She wanted out of bed and wanted to go into her living room and sit in her recliner.
I called my husband and brother in from the garage, granting Mom's wish, and we moved her into her living room. In the back of my mind - I knew what was happening. My mother was having what I call an awakening. She was completely pain free, spoke to my son on the phone for more than a half hour, went through all her cross-stitching instruction books and told me which ones she had made in past years and for whom, ate dinner with my husband, my brother and me, and tried to work a crossword puzzle.
Mother was filled with such happiness; the smile on her face went literally from ear to ear. She was more beautiful than I had ever seen her -- almost child-like. It was as if she was floating on Cloud Nine; glowing.
As we sat at the dinner table while she tried to work the crossword puzzle, I saw her eyelids getting heavy. I didn't want her to fall asleep, because I knew it would all end, so I did all I could to keep her awake. Finally, we had no choice but to move her back into her bed and then Mother and I started watching Dancing With The Stars on television. She commented how Kirstie Alley was her favorite competitor, but within moments, she fell asleep. About an hour later, she awoke in pain.
I won't go into all that happened during the rest of the night, because I am determined to celebrate and not mourn.
I am so blessed to have been a part of those three-hours with my mother in her euphoric state. It was nothing short of beautiful. I wish I could have frozen it in time.
And, how fitting that today our household is also celebrating another great moment - my husband is the winner of the coveted mirror ball trophy from our own version of the popular TV dance show - here called Dancing With Our PALs. It's an annual fundraiser for the local Police Athletic League and the children it serves. I truly wish my mother could have seen him dance his Paso Doble', Country Two-Step and Wobble; she'd have been both stunned and so very proud! (I guess this is what they call a full circle.)
So let's celebrate with Mom's Meatloaf:
For meatloaf:
1 lb. ground beef 1 egg
1 tsp. salt 1/2 cup catsup
1 small onion, chopped 1 cup oats
Mix it all together and form a loaf.
Bake at 35-degrees in a covered baking dish for about one-hour, pouring sauce over the top of the meatloaf about 45-minutes into baking.
And now for the sauce:
1 cup catsup 1/2 cup light brown sugar
2 tbsp. mustard
Mix all ingredients together.
Remove cover from baking meatloaf and pour sauce over meatloaf 45-minutes into baking. Continue baking for about 15-minutes at 350-degrees. (or until done)
For dessert, I prepared a parfait of brownie bits and white chocolate pudding.
Yummy.
Tonight we celebrate my mother, her influence on me, her love for family, her culinary prowess, her appreciation for my husband, her Girl Scout leadership skills, her being the greatest grandmother on this earth, her smile - her life.
"Thank you, Mom, for giving me those three-ish hours to look back on with such happiness. I'm still trying to figure things out, Mom, but tomorrow I'll jump right in and do it all, again. I love you and miss you."
