I used to talk to my mom about everything.
I've never relied on my husband for that type of relationship; only Mom.
I didn't recognize it until she was gone, but she was definitely my BFF - long before that became trendy to say.
I miss her every day, but most of all when I need her to fix things. Moms always fix things, right?
I'm having one of those Alexander's Terrible Horrible No-Good Very Bad Day months.
I feel like I'm crawling out of my skin, with an incredibly distressful job, pressures that I can't openly discuss, thyroid levels out of whack, realizing my son doesn't need me anymore, and losing friends whom I thought were lasting - it's beginning to be more than I can bear. I find myself crying all the time.
Mom always made me see things a little more clearly; making me stop and think. Period.
And she always put a different twist to whatever it was I was talking to her about.
I wish I could put my finger on what it was that she was able to do, then I'd be handling this heavy load, instead of whining about it.
Truth is, I've made a decision about something and that decision is definitely going to affect my reputation, which is something I've taken great pride in for many years. I know there are people who will not stand with me.
Then comes the other voice in my head telling me that I'm a whiny bitch and that so many other people out there have it much worse. "Buck UP!"
Well, screw that -- I need my mommy!! Right now!!
